As many of you know, three nights ago was a rather historic night, astrologically speaking. It was a dark moon and an excellent annular eclipse. I am rather disappointed that us in the eastern United States were not able to see it, but I still acknowledged it. Okay, witch confession time… I have never done anything for the Dark/New Moon. I honestly did not know what to for a Dark Moon. I hate googling things to determine what I should do. I have been trying to make myself work more off of instinct and less off of what the books tell me. So I decided that I would do something for this very epic night of darkness.
So, for inspiration, I decided to go on a spirit walk. I have walked my development hundreds of times, I would much rather walk a forest path or somewhere more wild, but it just isn’t possible in this area. The most wild places are parks which close at dusk. So, my spirit walks often happen along the sidewalks and shadows of my suburban development. So I donned by bone choker and kicked off my shoes and set off into the night.
Given the conditions of last night, I was thinking about darkness. How it applies to me and what darkness means to me. I spent nearly two hours wandering the streets. A lot of things occurred to me on that walk and I had a bit of an experience that was very eye-opening for me. I already had the idea in my mind that darkness is a very important concept. I could get into a big discussion on duality, but I assume most of you agree that without darkness, there is no light, so I will spare you that chat. So the main question that popped into my head that night was “What is my darkness? How does it apply to me?” I received an answer and then some.
I achieved a bit of a journey state on my walk. I was aware of the development. I could hear the cars rumbling on the highway, the train whistle and people sitting on their porches as I walked by. I was aware of them, but they seemed so far away. I felt very different too. I have never been in a moving journey state. Hell, a lot of the time I struggle with a motionless journey. I was rather excited, but I forced myself to focus on what I was experiencing. It didn’t feel the same as other journeys either. I was not me. To be honest, I felt like a caged animal. Some great wolf struggling against unseen bonds. I wanted to be free. I wanted to run, to hunt, to breed, to eat. It felt like pure survival. I spent nearly an hour like this, slinking around my development in the dark. At first I was confused as to why I was experiencing this. Never before had I felt like this on a journey. I felt like i should have been scared, but it just felt right to let this out and experience what I could. As my feet brought me back onto my street, I came back to the surface.
Once I was almost fully back into this world, I understood. My brain put all the pieces together in one big revelatory explosion. Darkness. I am amazed I never even thought about it before. Darkness is not evil, that I knew. To me darkness is that primal side. That deep, instinctual part of us that most people hide away and keep under strict control. It may sound simple, but I had honestly never thought about it before. I realized that this side of my is critical to my spirituality. Working with that darker side. The instinct and the primal energy are not things to be controlled. This sort of thing should be worked with and worked into your craft. I did an entire ritual completely off the cuff (off of instinct) and it felt more powerful than half of the ones that I had planned for days ahead of time. I think that we can learn a lot from tapping into this instinctual side of ourselves, and many of the great witches out there are already able to do so.
So I performed my ritual in darkness, it didn’t feel right to light a candle when I was honoring the darkness in all of us. I finished the evening with a more traditional journey. When I was done, it was probably 1 or 2 in the morning. I came back into the house ravenous. So after a quick snack and a small rest I went to bed to dream about all that I had learned that night.
Definitely a profound revelation for me. Like I said before, this may seem simple, but it had never occurred to me before. It makes so much sense that I almost facepalmed at my own naivete. It also made me realize how much more I have to learn about myself and the path that I am walking.